
I used to hate myself.
I used to hate myself 😲
I used to put everyone and everything before myself.
When one of my mentors said to me “If you’re tired of the way people are treating you, take a look at how you’re treating yourself” … That blew my mind
It had never occurred to me that the level of respect that I gave myself, would determine the respect I got from others.
I always made excuses for why something else was more important than taking care of myself.
I would get started on some diet with a burst in motivation, only to burn out in less than 2 weeks.
It would start with just missing a day here and there, but before long it would be days at a stretch.
I didn’t respect myself, my body or my time. I would try to force it into submission.
And, when it didn’t work, I would get angry, and I would beat myself up. “You’re so weak, you can’t even stick to a diet for 30 days” … “You’re such a loser, you have no willpower or discipline” … 😡
Those are some of the mild things I would say to myself in the privacy of my own thoughts 😥
It’s so sad to think about how I used to treat myself.
I tried starving my body into submission. I tried cutting out all pleasure from eating … “Food is just fuel” I would try to tell myself.
Looking back, I can’t believe how I thought that removing all joy from my life would somehow lead to losing weight and being healthy.
Like, “hmmm, if I punish myself and make myself absolutely miserable, that should work, right?”
But thankfully those chapters of my story are truly behind me.
And no, things didn’t happen because I have 6-pack abs (I don’t). It started because I have coaches and mentors in my life who didn’t treat me the way I treated myself.
They didn’t abuse me verbally, they didn’t treat me with disgust, they didn’t try to “motivate” me with shame or guilt.
They treated me with respect, dignity and compassion.
They showed me how to love myself without empty platitudes.
You cannot hate your way healthy. Your relationship with food is a lens into your relationship with yourself.
When you’re done with trying to punish your way into weight loss, when you’re ready to start enjoying the joy of food again, when you’re ready to be at peace with yourself again, reach out and let’s talk. ❤️🙏