A Negative Outlook will never give you a Positive life.

A lot of people think that in the future, somewhere, is a life free from problems, struggles and challenges. And I think this is precisely where a lot of negativity comes from:

Resenting that life is hard, and that we’re faced with challenges daily. I think that some of this also comes from the fact that social media shows a highlight reel because, let’s be honest, moping about how life sucks isn’t going to garner a lot of likes.

One exercise I practice a lot is re-framing. I don’t buy into this fantasy where if I just think enough happy thoughts, my life will become perfect, and I’ll be happy every day. I call that delusional positivity.

I expect that life is going to be hard, and that it will challenge me. I expect that I will have sadness, anger, frustration, along with happiness, joy and contentment. Re-framing is simply changing my perspective on this.

Sadness makes moments of happiness richer. Frustration makes moments of contentment more satisfying. Being challenged means I have to develop new skills, become stronger, and seek help, which drives human connection.

Gratitude, as a practice, often gets presented as this “Woo” state of zen-like, breathless bliss. But the truth is, you’re not stupid, and you know deep down when you’re trying to delude yourself into happiness.

But, gratitude has power, when practiced meaningfully, because it turns our attention to the genuinely good things in our life.

Re-framing isn’t easy. It actually takes conscious effort in the beginning, especially if you’ve spent a lot of time focusing on all the problems and negativity in your life.

In doing so, you’ve actually wired your brain to hunt for the negative, and you don’t undo that overnight.

A phrase I use to remind myself to reframe is “Hunt for the GOOD”

That reminds me that finding the good is not always an easy task. It will take some effort.

At the core of this, I often discover 3 major themes:
1. This will make me stronger, as I am pushed beyond my current abilities.

2. This will connect me more deeply to others in my life, as I ask for help, and graciously receive it.

3. This will deepen my gratitude for what I have in my life, as I recognize that it could be taken from me in an instant.

This practice of “Hunt for the GOOD” has helped me to reframe many of the injustices I have faced in my life.

And, I want to remember one last thing: My ego would like to tell me that life isn’t fair.

But nothing could be further from the truth. Life is the ultimate in impartiality. I am one of roughly 8 billion people who have walked this planet. I am no more or no less valuable than any other life.

I am owed nothing in this life. Everything that I have that isn’t “nothing” is a blessing. So perhaps I could refine my motto just a little bit more:

Hunt for the GOOD without expectation.

This, to me, is what true Positivity is.